1. moriartystayingalive:

    My mom sprayed our house for fleas, but then she didn’t want to breathe in the poisonous fumes, so she went outside and smoked a cigarette.

    (via dersekingdom)

  2. (Source: -tiffany-, via fuckinq)

  3. (via ebolir)

  4. fatwink:

    mynameisnipple:

    fatwink:

    *meme noise*

    shut the fuck up

    *sad meme noise*

    (Source: whitepassing, via themousebot)

    the-treble:

    afternoonsnoozebutton:

    Can we all just talk about Promise Phan (dope2111 on Youtube) real quick?

    (via supersasswholocked)

  5. (Source: smackmybxxtchup, via fuckinq)

  6. (Source: lowtop, via tomasfaiella)

  7. How about a sexy pic

    dersekingdom:

    image

    (Source: killerkunoichi, via somequeershit)

  8. elvenfetich:

    Trying to write a fanfic

    image

    Someone saying they love it on the first chapter 

    image

    (via somethingclassysomethingvulgar)

  9. fefeferi:

    when u accidentally hurt ur friends feelings and they insist that its fine but u know it isnt

    image

    (Source: funayurei, via carryonmy-assbutt)

  10. asianfetus:

    "honey what’s wrong? you don’t look very well"

    image

    (via barebackinq)

  11. lmaoalien:

    i am the human version of the first piece of bread

    (via intensional)

  12. mumblingsage:

    govthookercoulson:

    cuntgradulation:

    pantslesswrock:

    joanna-kaana:

    this is a necessity for me

    dude the oxford comma is the shit i am all up on that bitch like woo woo

    image

    I would like to thank my parents, God and Ayn Rand. 

    (Source: feelinalrightsaturdaynight, via somethingclassysomethingvulgar)